My Days of Gratitude: Day 5. Hello Handsome!

Spot the nose!

Dr. pointed out the nose, the mouth, the cheeks, the hands and others but all I see is..... (fill in the blank)

Never thought it'd be this nerve wrecking. A mixture of feelings all boiled up into one - nervousness, curiosity, anxiousness, blissfulness, Oh-no-will-I-ever-be-ready??!! It is a journey of no other, to be watching your body doing its own work, and accepting the fact that you are just a mere observer and there's nothing much you can do, really.. that all you got to do is wonder, put your full trust in God, sit back and enjoy the moment.

It's astonishing how much love we have for you even before we even met. It is funny how comforting you can be during my times of need; always assuring me that I am not alone from your soft kicking and turnings, or on some days, the somersaults.

Tentatively I'll be seeing you in less than 7 week's time.. ! You are my one tough cookie, I pray hard for smooth delivery, good health; physically, mentally, emotionally.. for all of us!

Can't wait to see you, Handsome!

My Days of Gratitude - Day 4. One year after

My Buddy dearest,

Thank you for the every day, 

That you make me feel like the Queen of the play.

May our fondness remain
As bright as the sun,
As full as the moon,
Until the end of our journey here on earth,
Holding each others hands in Heaven

InsyaAllah

XOX

Seniors

There was a topic on radio on who's responsibility it is to take care of the senior citizens; the government, the children, or the seniors themselves. Here in Asian especially in Malaysia, it is frown upon to even think of sending your parents to a nursery or the old folk's home.

Imho, naturally every kids would want to take care of their parents. It is in every kid's heart the willingness to provide and care for their parents when they are old enough, should they have the means and capacities to do so. It is natural for parents too, not to burden the kids with such responsibility, unless unintentionally.

It is the same as the way parents took care of their children when they were young. Remember when we were kids, some were sent to nurseries and daycare centres while the parents went to work. Some stayed with their grandparents, and some got maid hired to keep an eye on them at home. In unfortunate cases where the kids were sick or needed special assistance and attention to live by, they were sent and 'kept' in hospital or special institution where specialist and experts could help with them getting better.

Now the cycle is reversed, it's unfair to judge those sending their parents to old folk's home as bad children. Dumping them to any homes or hospitals and totally ignoring them, leaving everything in the hand of the caretaker, don't bother to go and visit; now THAT's negligence. Otherwise in cases where the parents are incapable in taking care of themselves and the kids can't afford to quit working to look after the parents 24/7, it should be OK for them to be sent to sort of a daycare centre while the kids go to work. You don't have to if you can afford to find a nurse to take care of them at home.

As we don't judge parents who sent their kids to daycare centres, it is unfair to judge kids who send their parents to good quality old folk's homes - that's what I think. The regulators can help by providing more flexibility and benefits to kids such as better, qualified centres, special leave from work to take care of parents, subsidies and others. Awareness on better retirement plan should be instilled too as well as better lifestyle in terms of maintaining a good health and a sound mind. Also one of the caller on radio mentioned on the importance of "siblings' meeting", which I totally agree with.

Family is everything. We love them, we want the best for them. We hope and pray for their happiness, always, herein and hereafter, insyaAllah

Man *sigh

Out of focus

Status update: My life is a mess.

As messy and dirty as the state of my boots

And my car with the missing plate number

Distracted.

Nothing gets done.

Too many productivity killers.

Need to focus.

The flesh is willing,

but the spirit is weak.

Good night. 

Late Uncle

Suatu hari di hari raya..

"Ayah Nyah awak tu baik sangat, Mak Nyah rindu sangat dia, rasa macam semalam je, tapi dah tiga tahun dah..

 

Orang kampung selalu cakap, Ayah Nyah tu baik, sentiasa tolong azan kat masjid, tolong kalau ada kenduri, tak pernah berkira nak pinjamkan van ke amek pisang ke apa ke.. Insya Allah, Ayah Nyah bahagia di sana.. 

 

Bila Mak Nyah demam, sakit sikit, tak larat nak masak, Ayah Nyah masakkan siap hantar kat katil. Bila Mak Nyah penat, Ayah Nyah yang masakkan, dia faham, tak pernah paksa atau merungut..

 

Bila jalan-jalan dengan anak-anak, mana-mana, mesti belikan makanan “Haaa ni Mak korang suka makan”

 

Bila tak kerja, lepas hantar anak-anak pergi sekolah, kadang-kadang “Pah, jom pergi keluar makan”, terus pergi dating berdua pergi makan, jalan-jalan dekat-dekat ke jauh-jauh sikit ke..

 

Nak tinggi suara, memang tak pernah. Dia tau Mak Nyah macam mana, tak penah marah Mak Nyah depan orang, tak pernah tegur kasar-kasar, sentiasa backing Mak Nyah depan orang lain.. Berlembut sangat dengan Mak Nyah, dengan anak-anak.

 

Anak-anak semua sayang sangat kat dia, dalam seminggu tu at least sekali la, mesti sebut Abah diorg. Rindu sangat-sangat..

 

Dah pernah dapat suami yang baik camtu, macam mana la nak terbukak hati lagi nak terima orang lain yang mengorat2 ni..

 

Mak Nyah redha, tapi memang sampai sekarang rindu lagi, tak terbukak pintu hati lagi... "

*kesat air mata

 

Al Fatihah Ayah Nyah. Semoga kita semua mendapat jodoh yang baik seperti beliau insya Allah 

On your side

Going to work this morning, I found myself sighing at this T-junction as traffic was stalled - I wasn't expecting that as it was still way to early for going-to-work traffic jam. As I drove onwards, I saw a lady sprawling by the road side. Apparently there was an accident, to my relief she looked pretty much alive. From the look of it, I reckoned that she fell of this motorcycle she was riding to work with her husband. That was when I suddenly realised why people would want to get a life partner or get married.
 
How did it come to that? As I sat there in my car watching the patrol officer clearing up the area, the (assumed) husband, bleeding profusely from the mouth, kept attending to his (assumed) wife, consoling her, cleaning up here face with a piece of cloth, hugging and covering her from the commotion building up around them. She was clearly upset and in pain, and just having someone by her side in that time of need, was already something I would've greatly appreciate myself.

<3

In a perfect world, marriage is having the assurance that someone will always be there for you. Even for instance if that lady was not with her husband during that accident, the husband would be the first one being notified, the first person who'd rushed to the hospital to see her and stay with her 'till she gets better.
I didn't get that before. I don't really know how that scenario led me to that understanding but yes it made me understand on one of the many reasons of why people would want to have a life partner.

We have parents, bestfriends, good friends, good samaritans and all the good people in the world that would lend a hand but would they really be there in your time of need? Maybe, but would they always be on your side? Only when it's convenient to them.

Having a life partner is sort of having all that, someone that is yours truly, that would ALWAYS be on your side. He would make time for you, would commit, would get angry and be mad at you for doing stupid things but would would never leave you or give up on you (unless you've crossed the line of course)

A bit too far fetched? Maybe.

I just hope that lady is OK. Stay safe on the road everyone!

Pledge

Hi,

I'm giving up my next birthday for clean water. Check out my charity:water campaign! mycharitywater.org/nanayau

Thanks!

When

"When your girl wants to get married and you don't, my advice is to break it off.."

"I don't think there is anything wrong with someone wanting to get married. I really don't. But I also see nothing's wrong with not wanting to get married. What I see as wrong, is not respecting your needs as well as respecting the needs of your partner. It's wrong when two people can't accept that they each want different things in life. She really can't expect to be able to pressure you into taking a huge life altering step that you don't want to take. But guess what, Skippy. It works both ways. The same goes for you. You can't expect her to give up on a huge life changing step that she wants to take.."

Miniature

I want one!

Miniature garden, picture from Moskkithings

Why am I..

"When Muslims, Christians, Hindus, Buddhists alike realise and respect the sacredness in the other, and drop the claim that they alone monopolise all that is good and holy; perhaps then we will be one step closer to recognising the fundamental humanity we share with each other – whether we like it or not"

Why I'm  a Muslim:
I believe in the concept of a sole Creator; something as mind blowing and complex as the universe and everything in it MUST have a Creator, and the Creator must be in the form of ultimate greatness, beyond the limitation of our logical mind. In that sense, only Islam has given me that most acceptable answer, in the most logical way it can be.

On the highest peak of South East Asia - the Mt. Kinabalu, 2009

Why I'm a Muslim:
I love history, and understanding the Quran (well, most of it) is like reading a great rendition of the world from its very beginning, and how beautiful of a book it is indeed. Beautifully written that you don't have to really understand it to know that it is an extremely good book.

Why I'm a Muslim:
I've never understood this before but as I grow up, I understand why Mom says that we need religion to keep us sane, especially in times of great sorrow and trouble. It teaches you not to mourn the passing of loved ones to the point of ruining your own lives, it teaches you not to lose hope when everything else fails, as you know, that the Al Mighty is constantly there, watching over you. You believe that He is looking after you, and Him being the Most Gracious and the Most Merciful, won't let anything hurt you beyond your limit. Dzikir and prayers and even the simple reading of the Quran can give the serenity you seek, the peace of mind, like reading something soothing, and saying positive things to yourself.

Why I'm a Muslim:
I love the concept of having my hair covered. I don't wear it because Islam says so, I started doing it out of instinct - it made me feel safe. I can only speak for myself; don't know why others do it but for me, it is my control factor. When I wear it, people simply don't ask me to do bad things with them. I get less harassment, less unnecessary attention; which suits me best (may be not suitable for those who loves extra attention, imho). I agree that it makes you less attractive, less fashionable and some people might hate it, but I am comfortable with it. So to me, if you don't want to wear it, you just won't wear it, even if the religion says so.

Why I'm a Muslim:
Islam is in simple word, believing in the Almighty, and the teachings delivered by Muhammad (p.b.u.h). I was born a Muslim. I was taught the Malay Muslim way of living, which may differ greatly from those other Muslims but the fundamental, of believing in Him and the teachings, are the same, supposed to be the same.

It's the "design appraisal," the proves I kept encountering on the logic and reasons on why certain things are banned in Islam - eating pork (it is also banned in the bible), drinking alcohol, the 'hudud' and others. Many often than not, those banned things cause more bad than good to us human, so why do it the first place? For instance the alcohol, yes it is used widely used in the perfume, cosmetics and medicine industry, in a controlled manner, for good causes. Unlike if you were to consume it directly, responsibly or not, the influence of alcohol turns your mind and body into something that you can't control 100%. I love my body, I love my mind - those are the only things that I owned, it is mine 100% and I don't like to be out of control. If you think you can have total control on your actions and thinking even under the influence of alcohol, by all means, continue doing it.

Well that's just me, in the simplest English, most layman way of sharing the reasons why I am a Muslim. Better answers can be found from experts and scholars but yeah, I like who I am right now, always trying to be the best me I can be. It is the matter of preference, some might like it and do it, some might love being a Muslim or a Buddhist, others don't. Let's just not forget that at the end of the day, we are all human being, under the same human race, so no such thing as good person bad person, good race bad race; no one is technically better than anyone else, not until they were to inflict harm on others. Period.

Have a great week!

Small things



"You sit"

"In the end, it's the small things that matter. The first cup of coffee every morning, the kind, random deeds, and eventually giving up the remote control.. It does not always have to be hard work"

Happy New Year

From a Calvin and Hobbes collection by Bill Watterson. Here's to another great year, happy 2012 everyone!

Us Against The World

"Like a river to a raindrop, I lost a friend

My drunken as a Daniel in a lion's den

And tonight I know it all has to begin again

So whatever you do, don't let go"

Have a lovely Friday!



Have a lovely day!



Push on through



Swimming through. Nusa Penida, Bali. September 2011

"It's easy to give up, or start over, but it takes strength to push on through, and when you do, when you fight for it, when you pay attention, when you shut up and listen: you get to where you want to go, and you feel like a winner.

So when you're feeling frustrated, when you are about to give up, remember 'this too shall pass', and push on through"



from Its the little things and tacos

BFF

from LoveQuotes

My Days of Gratitude - Day 3

to get to hold hands

"You made me laugh, wiped my tears, hugged me tight, saved my life, watched me succeed, seen me failed, cheered me on, kept me going, put up with my mood swings, has said that everything will be alright when things get tough, kept me sane"

I am lucky, to be given the chance once again to love and be loved without intention, to care and be taken care off without expectation; I take you as the promise from God that I will always have a best friend, forever.

No second chance

A good read

"Abe recalled hearing medical examiners say a person who died lost twenty-one grams of weight - the measure of a human soul. He realized, though, holding his daughter in his arms, that the scale was all wrong. Loss should have been measured in leagues: the linear time line he would not spend with her as she lost her first tooth, lost her heart over a boy, lost the graduation cap she tossed into a silvered sky.

Loss should have been measured circularly, like angles: the minutes between the two of them, the degrees of separation"

Weight and Measure by Jodi Picoult in Stories edited by Neil Gaiman & Al Sarrantonio.

Life has taught us one thing and that there is only that one chance, to everything in it. There is no guarantee of a second nor a third chance, as certain as death of loved ones, death of everyone, death of all of us.

We have one life, the one and only life. We only need that one chance of a lifetime to live life to the fullest, to love and be in love, to stay happy, to let our loved ones know that they are loved, to do good things, to learn and gain knowledge, to cure cancer, to climb that mountain, to realize our dreams, and many more great things.

Let's not waste this one chance. Carpe diem! 

Created and Creates

Two months ago..

"Cam aku, I have faith. I'm like Professor X of X-men hehe. OK abaikan contoh di atas. Aku yakin je ada Tuhan and religion to me is a lifestyle, and logic, setakat mana yang aku buatlah. Yang tak logik, bodoh semua tu come from the followers. Aku just yakin there's a creator and I can speak directly to him (praying, etc) and that's it. Benda-benda lain tu, tah".

"In some society that's called delusion, heh. Joking."

"HAHA! You know me, aku kan spiritual konon. Aku kan suka observe alam and logik untuk aku, semua benda ni ada penciptanya"

"For me, I believe in chaos and randomness, and that the universe is an accident"

"Tula, accident. Aku mula ingat camtu gak. Just that aku kagum, dengan keindahan alam, anatomi manusia, so aku percaya, kepada apa tu aku tak sure sangat (in how to explain it).. "

" I understand - you believe that something so complex must have a designer, and cannot be the result of many mutation"